Merlin
My first lessons:
These pictures were taken during Merlin's first winter with me. He was living in a mixed herd with a very large cover all for the shelter of 9 horses. They have access to full pasture for winter and summer grazing. I just left him to do a reset with the other horses and asked nothing of him for a year and a half. He got to choose when and what he ate, when he went in and when he was out, and who he spend his time with. He also had the option of the natural shelter of hawthorns or the coverall. I found a barefoot trimmer who specialises in rehabilitation of lame horses. I had her trim for about a year with little change. At that point I had to change trimmers and soon after that Merlin was sound. He remains sound except during very icy periods in the winter. Merlin has had allergies (Sweet Itch) for many years. After he came into my care his skin allergies began to get worse. I did everything I knew to do. I am actually quite a good energy healer and have always had a great deal of success with any animals I worked with. But, not Merlin. He continued to get worse with and without medical intervention. I lost a LOT of confidence with myself. |
Merlin is an ex-horse-park-riding-school horse. I knew him during that time. Each year he became more depressed and despondent until his final year, he was injured the week prior to the school opening for the season and was off, lame most of that warm weather season.
He spent his days on his own, in a state of complete despair and hopelessness that no one had noticed he did not like being ridden by every beginner rider that came to the school. He also had friends in the barn who he loved dearly, but since the horses were separated by gender he was in a pasture with Hickory, a lovely, but high spirited pony who just wanted to play. Merlin, did not. The pony chased Merlin around the pasture, and Merlin got more depressed by the day. One day I was in Merlin's stall with him and I heard the words "Will you take me home with you?", and got a little image of a house looking a lot like the house beside the pastures. I was in the house and he was in the pasture behind. I didn't know how to respond. I lived in town and there was not much of a possibility of the neighbours, or the town agreeing to have a horse on the property. I looked at him and could feel he was eager for a response, but I didn't know what to tell him. I said I would do what I could. That was not an answer that made sense to him. I could feel his process, and he had absolutely no concept of being owned and me not having the ability at that time to take him home without breaking the law. In his mind he was free to choose for himself, and he did not understand why his choice was not being honoured.
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Merlin ~ Behaviour
As I mentioned, Merlin was quite depressed toward his last days at the riding school. Late in the fall, the year he had injured himself the riding school shut down. I was concerned about where he would end up; a lame, depressed draft-X, without a home. I also remembered his request to me to bring him home. It was a tough decision. I liked Merlin, but we had not connected. Certainly not like I was connected with Dimples. And, I didn't have a home I could take him to. Taking on a horse that was basically a rescue is one thing when you have your own farm, but a whole other thing when that horse has to be boarded. I knew there was little time to make a decision and I eventually approached the owner of the horse park and offered to take him.
That was over three years ago and I do think that he still holds some resentment that he is not "home" with me. As I mentioned I left him to be a horse, and just visited him for a year and a half: asking nothing of him related to riding. I wanted to give him that time to decompress from the stress of being in a life that he did not want. To be honest I realise now that I have had expectations about that time. I expected him to become more responsive. To bond with me more. To release some of that "piss off" attitude he has always had. He released some of that, but not a lot.
One of the things I became aware of early on with him is that he is very big, very slow, and very smart. He is also incredibly sensitive. It was clear to me, right from the beginning that he had been handled with a very heavy hand most of his life. Big and slow usually translates to dumb. At least for many humans. It can also translate to "disrespect" in the minds of many. Disrespect is a word used a lot in the horse world, but not a word I like when used with horses. I have never perceived disrespect from a horse that I was handling or observing. Merlin processes very quickly mentally, but then takes a bit of time to get his bulk to respond. Without patience, or without the understanding that his timing to response might not be on the same timeline as a human expects, he had been judged negatively. But, he is doing his best. It is easy for a person handling or riding Merlin to over stimulate him or become heavy in the hand or leg thinking he is unresponsive. Then add that to a horse who is extremely sensitive.
I have tried many different things to get close to Merlin. Nothing has really worked. Not that he does not love me. He really does. But, he has little use for me. What I am beginning to realise is that he is like that toward me because when i am with him, I do the same thing that others have done with him, that have caused him to mistrust humans. What I mean by that is I lead him, I ride him, I brush him etc. I started looking to him for some ideas. Merlin is one of the greatest passive leaders I have ever seen in the horse world. He is kind and just, and he loves to harmonise the herd. He will share his hay with ANY horse as long as they behave in a respectful way toward him. He actually prefers to share his hay. This preference to hay sharing gave me an idea. What if that is the way he develops relationships best...?
Every day I give him hay cubes with immune system supporting herbs etc. (I muscle tested everything to make sure, and he loves them.) I now sit on the ground while he is eating so we are face to face. The change is incredible. I have never felt him like this. Of course I don't encourage everyone to do this. I do it because he has a long history of being very passive with food sharing. Not every horse is like this. I encourage discerning clearly what is perfect for each indifudual situation rather than trying techniques. What I am doing is not a technique. It comes from very clear and direct perception of what is right for that unique situation. That is the work. The journey is the work and the road to connection. The technique is misused it if is applied where it is not fully appropriate. What I am suggesting is to use what your horse loves the most and use that as a bonding opportunity.
That was over three years ago and I do think that he still holds some resentment that he is not "home" with me. As I mentioned I left him to be a horse, and just visited him for a year and a half: asking nothing of him related to riding. I wanted to give him that time to decompress from the stress of being in a life that he did not want. To be honest I realise now that I have had expectations about that time. I expected him to become more responsive. To bond with me more. To release some of that "piss off" attitude he has always had. He released some of that, but not a lot.
One of the things I became aware of early on with him is that he is very big, very slow, and very smart. He is also incredibly sensitive. It was clear to me, right from the beginning that he had been handled with a very heavy hand most of his life. Big and slow usually translates to dumb. At least for many humans. It can also translate to "disrespect" in the minds of many. Disrespect is a word used a lot in the horse world, but not a word I like when used with horses. I have never perceived disrespect from a horse that I was handling or observing. Merlin processes very quickly mentally, but then takes a bit of time to get his bulk to respond. Without patience, or without the understanding that his timing to response might not be on the same timeline as a human expects, he had been judged negatively. But, he is doing his best. It is easy for a person handling or riding Merlin to over stimulate him or become heavy in the hand or leg thinking he is unresponsive. Then add that to a horse who is extremely sensitive.
I have tried many different things to get close to Merlin. Nothing has really worked. Not that he does not love me. He really does. But, he has little use for me. What I am beginning to realise is that he is like that toward me because when i am with him, I do the same thing that others have done with him, that have caused him to mistrust humans. What I mean by that is I lead him, I ride him, I brush him etc. I started looking to him for some ideas. Merlin is one of the greatest passive leaders I have ever seen in the horse world. He is kind and just, and he loves to harmonise the herd. He will share his hay with ANY horse as long as they behave in a respectful way toward him. He actually prefers to share his hay. This preference to hay sharing gave me an idea. What if that is the way he develops relationships best...?
Every day I give him hay cubes with immune system supporting herbs etc. (I muscle tested everything to make sure, and he loves them.) I now sit on the ground while he is eating so we are face to face. The change is incredible. I have never felt him like this. Of course I don't encourage everyone to do this. I do it because he has a long history of being very passive with food sharing. Not every horse is like this. I encourage discerning clearly what is perfect for each indifudual situation rather than trying techniques. What I am doing is not a technique. It comes from very clear and direct perception of what is right for that unique situation. That is the work. The journey is the work and the road to connection. The technique is misused it if is applied where it is not fully appropriate. What I am suggesting is to use what your horse loves the most and use that as a bonding opportunity.
Merlin as a Healer
In this image, Merlin is standing with a horse that is new at the barn. He was a very scattered horse and had issues with behaviour. He was the kind of horse who I did not trust to behave in a safe way. Not because he was poorly handled, or abused. But, because his energy was in such a state of non coherence he behaved in an erratic way.
The picture above was how they spend the first 10 or so days together. Their hips almost glued together. It was not Merlin. The other horse followed him everywhere he went. Eventually the space between them got bigger and bigger until they were acting independently. By that time the other horse was a different horse. Not only had his energy field shift but he was holding his own balanced zero point and his behaviour had drastically changed. He was like a different horse. |
Merlin's great skill and passion is as a healer. What he does is best described by the Institute of Heart Math with their work on Heart Rate Variability. Merlin has a huge heart, and he holds very powerful Very Low Frequency (VLF). If you are interested in understanding this in detail you can visit the Hearth Math website https://www.heartmath.org
In my work I describe it as a Zero Point. Our hearts all have a zero point. When our zero point in our heart and the zero point in our brain come into coherence, we have heart mind coherence. This state is very powerful for entering altered states of awareness, but it is most beneficial in that it has the power to shift us out of a stress state, or a state of non coherence. Coherance is just what it sounds like. When we are in a coherent state our cells, bodies, systems and energy fields are harmonious. That harmonious state supports a state of wellbeing. When we are in a non coherent state those things are out of sync. Non-Coherent state is the biggest cause of illness, both physical and emotional in all species. Merlin, draws horses to him that want this kind of support. |
© Heather Rusk 2018
